Our little blog has been neglected for the past year. I love looking back on what we’ve written; I remember snapshots of family life as they happened…Seth learning to use his little slide…Evan falling asleep for the first time in his big boy bed…Nora and Maya being born healthy and strong.
Sometimes the act of writing seems daunting to me; I want to get it right! But, then I don’t write. So, to get it right…all you have to do is write.
I have a picture in my mind of documenting this year as a series of observations written at each holiday. A modest goal, to get me writing, and to get words to the page.
I’ve followed the online tradition of choosing One Little Word to frame my year (thanks, blogger Ali Edwards!) for the last several years.
(2016) Continue…(2017) sweeten…(2018) bolster…
(2019) Refocus…enrich…deepen! Yes, deepen.
So, on Rosh Hashanah, the Jewish New Year, I look towards deepening. Deepening our relationships, our efforts to go beyond the surface. For myself, I focus in on the activities, the relationships, the interactions that will sustain me, but not the ones that I feel obligated to. Choose where I can make a difference and deepen my commitment.
Last week, I did something hard. I read three verses of Torah at Rosh Hashanah services. I had been wanting to do this for some time. I hadn’t read Torah for 28 years, since my Bat Mitzvah. But, I wanted to do it again. Seth is having his Bar Mitzvah in two years, and Evan, Nora, and Maya are developing an idea of what their religion means to them as well.
I deepened my commitment to my learning. I practiced every night for a month in front of my kids. I was supported by our Cantor, our Rabbi, our community. I felt like I made a difference up there on the bimah. It was an incredible experience. It was hard, and it was scary. But it was worth it.
Sometimes, it just takes that first step. To get words down on paper. To choose something that is meaningful to you. To take a risk. To make a commitment (that makes sense for you). To deepen...